Funny Church Signs & Quotes

Great for church signs, bulletin boards, church bulletins, church flyers, etc.

  • Tomorrow's forecast: God reigns and the Son shines!

  • Why pay for GPS? Jesus gives directions for free.

  • Need a lifeguard? Ours walks on water!

  • What on earth are you doing for Heavens sake!

  • Honk if you love Jesus… Text while driving if you want to meet him.

  • God will accept broken hearts – but you must give Him all the pieces!

  • If the devil is knocking at your front door, let Jesus answer it!

  • T.G.I.F. - Thank God I'm Forgiven!

  • Is temptation knocking? Let Jesus get the door!

  • Faith is Not Blind, Faith is your sight Set On Jesus!

  • Feeling thankful and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.

  • God expects spiritual fruit, not religious nuts!

  • God wants full custody not just a weekend visit!

  • If God Is Your Co-Pilot, you better switch seats!

  • It’s a TREAT, not a Trick. God loves You!

  • 2 Great Truths: 1) There is a God… 2) You’re not Him!

  • When you throw mud at someone, you’re the one losing ground!

  • Autumn leaves. Jesus doesn't.

  • Heavenly forecast: God will reign forever!

  • May all your days have Son shine!

  • The 10 Commandments are not multiple choice!

  • The 10 Commandments are not 10 suggestions!

  • Jesus has a great “prophet-sharing” plan!

  • F.R.O.G. = Fully Rely On God!

  • Do you keep your Bible as close as your cell phone?

  • Church sign - ATM inside: Atonement, Truth, Mercy

  • Heaven’s riches are tax free!

  • “I’m also making a list and checking it twice” – God

  • God does not believe in atheists – therefore atheists do not exist.

  • Adam blamed Eve. Then Eve blamed the snake. Then the snake didn’t have a leg to stand on.

  • Do not criticize your wife’s judgment. See who she married.

  • Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity!

  • If evolution were true, Mother’s would have at least 3 arms.

  • Forbidden fruits create many jams.

  • For God so loved the world, that He didn't send a committee.

  • Don’t give up! Moses was once a basket-case too!

  • There will be a separation of church and state – the rapture!

  • Noah should have swatted the 2 mosquitoes!

  • Church bulletin – the peacemaking meeting today has been cancelled, due to a conflict.

  • Church bulletin – the low self-esteem support group meets Thursday. Please use the back door.

  • Church bulletin – Weight Watchers will meet at 7pm. Please use the large double doors at the side entrance.

  • The best vitamin for a Christian is B1

Church Signs and Sayings - Jesus, Salvation

  • Friends don’t let Friends die without Jesus.

  • True independence is dependence on Jesus.

  • Choose the “Bread of Life”, or you are toast.

  • Many who seek God in the eleventh hour die at 10:30!

  • If you don't like the way you were born try being born again!

  • ETERNITY: smoking, or non-smoking?

  • Need a new life? God accepts trade-ins!

  • Lost? Try GPS – God’s Plan of Salvation!

  • Jesus is an investment that never loses!

  • Life without Jesus is like an unsharpened pencil. It has no point.

  • Try Jesus! If you don’t like Him, the devil will gladly take you back!

  • Faithbook: Jesus has sent you a friend request.

  • Jesus loves You… and He approves this message!

Church Signs & Sayings - Prayers

  • God’s answers are wiser than our prayers!

  • 7 days without Prayer makes one WEAK!

  • Church sign – Our Church is Prayer Conditioned!

  • A family alter can alter a family!

  • No problem is too great to place in God's hands.

  • P.U.S.H. = Pray Until Something Happens!

  • Prayer – the ultimate wireless connection!

  • Prayer – Free wireless connection to God with no roaming fees!

  • God answers all knee mail.

  • Can't sleep? Don't count sheep - talk to the shepherd!

  • Faith is the postage stamp on our prayers.

Church Signs and Sayings - Churches

  • Church is like fudge… sweet, with a few nuts!

  • For Home Improvement – Bring the Family to Church.

  • The church is a gift from God. Some assembly required.

  • Shock your Mom… go to church today!

  • Church sign – we are not Dairy Queen… but, we have Great Sundays!